From here, from my
building, I could see the main square of my town, in fact, one of the biggest
cities of my country; a place where people used to spend the rest of the their days
for recharging for tomorrow; dormant from the city, from the lake of time for
themselves, tired of noise or screams for giving someone else the space for
passing. Now, I can see a place that my eyes had the pleasure of seeing it
full, full of people and kids playing on the structures, such energetic laughs
that just children have; the innocence for living the present without the
future, but always wait for tomorrow, the day when mom will take them for some
ice cream and lollypops. Today, 30 years later, it seems like a desert and the
only habitants are the ghosts of what one day has existed, one day has occupied
a set of now empty spaces; my walks are interrupted by lost and fixed eyes,
eyes of mine in the houses and cars left behind by someone; the richness that
now has lost the meaning, the existence that does not exist, anymore. The
desert of sadness and memories that for everyone is quite difficult to bury and
go on, go on after the claiming of nature for its place, something like “we
human are the problem;” for the first time as human could record, nature has
assumed an active and precise actions, for the first time no one was spared for
just being rich or having a “clean” curriculum. For centuries, humankind was
able to live with nature, or nature could respect it as an existence; perhaps,
we have never really existed and one day nature asked back the space we have
been occupying. ‘The day that non one can
forget’; freaks of “nature”, existences of god without the right to exist
in peace, in harmony with what one has we used to call ‘home’. The bodies that
one day walked on earth today is deposit of organic matter; today they return
to earth what has been used for all those long days; now we finally close the
loop of the sustainable chain, the so proclaimed close cycle of existence of
atoms, of matter. The machines that can actually defy nature by reversing
entropy now nothing can do; but except and hope, pure hope, fragile hope, that
we have learnt something, something that can the professor. Perhaps, god has
prepared a special place for those, those, whose legs no more sustain a body;
those that now redecorate a list of dead ones, a list that no one could record,
for not having paper enough paper, enough computer memory, enough human power.
On 2020, on a morning, on
a city where non one could ever expect, a person appeared with an unusual disease;
no one had a single opinion on the subject of the case, the origin, the fates
were just a crazy existence of matter. As close one proclaimed, the poor one
had started to disintegrate. They claim that a single unexplainable wound
finished out on a loss of arm and later some of the organs started out to lose
functionality and even the brain joined the list of effected parts; which wind
up on the death of the person. Non one had a single piece of information for
helping, just the tears of the close ones and the action of forgetting coming
from the authorities. As a matter of fact, this was not even recorded on papers-
the only recording device was the memory of the close ones -, since the bastard
guy was not rich and they thought of a single disease or an isolated case, but
that would turn out on the most destructive weapon on world; if the human race
endeavored on killing itself on the past, nature gave a big hand; finally
nature would pay back for all the arrogance of ours, non more changes, non more
time, non more gods and pray for mistakes unfinished and ‘un-regret-able.’ If
we knew about it, sure thing we would not waste our times trying to destroying
the close ones and enjoy the last minutes nature granted us, without a single
explanation, just a warning. Once I have concluded that if someday we had such
a catastrophe, we would not survive for simple reason, bureaucracy, the simple
action of making complicate what is not just for personal, individual reasons.
They would ask you for using a blue shoes just because they want to; further,
the shoes is not longer produced, just who has bought can apply for the job
position or university space; some can pay for making special releases of the
blue shoes of dignity; what a shoes has to do with brain? Ask them? Who are
they? I do not know, I just know they influence my life by stating what is for
me and what is not, making me losing time and hope for nothing than a single
minutes in the hopeful space of good souls.
I saw in a newspaper,
cheap one, the paper they give you for warping the old stuffs you insist
keeping; the paper you use in the bathroom….for cleaning the windows. This
called my attention and somehow that caught my eyes. I got in contact with the
family.
- Hi, My name is koha, I
am a scientist, independent. I saw what happened with your….
- Bother…[said one of the
guys showing some freaking intonation]
- ok, sorry, it was not
clear in the newspaper the relationship or, most likely, my memory has deceived
me.
- Is there anything we
might do for you [said the oldest woman, looking into my eyes in a stronger
manner]
- I understand your pain,
but perhaps what happened was not something that we must forget. Perhaps,
this….disease…or whatever that was…can help to avoid other happenings…I was
disappointed by the lack of importance they have given to your case, something
makes me believe that this is a serious disease. I cannot say anything precise
for now, just that I would like to investigate the case.
- The doctor said nothing
[tried to stress one of the women, sounding like someone close]
- This is the worst in my
opinion [I have placed those words moving my lips and body in a chase of
showing proximity] something takes me to believe that this might be the
starting of some new set of disease.
- No way! [said the most
serious boy that had corrected me in the beginning regard the familiar relation
in the beginning].
I have talked for hours.
They were a simple family. After some minutes of talk, a coffee came to
accompany the conversation; a big piece of cake, claimed to be prepared by the
oldest woman, someone seemed to be the mother of the mother of the dead one,
and leader somehow of the family. After the referred talk, I have started to
make a resource regarding the matter. This was unbelievable how I could not
find anything, any further information. The light was on, the darkness of the
remaining room came to me as inspiring thoughts, but none of them brought up
what I was seeking, looking for. In the following day I have started to send
some email.
Dear Paul,
Long time no see, I hope
your studies is going just well. I am contacting you regarding……….
From
your friend and colleague,
Dear Mark,
………………………..
……………….
Non one had a single idea about what I was
talking about. I felt like someone trying to make some high-school project
ordered by an old professor that kept the same style when she has concluded the
education; non one knows the terms used and notations! Further, I was risking
my image as a respected researcher. I suppose to answer questions, not making
them. This is the worst for scientists, appearing lost! But, I was to risk all
for that case. I have no idea why, but this was my wish. Perhaps the biggest
problem of our academic society is not the ignorance dressed by beautiful and
elegant clothes, but our extreme concern of keeping image, even in situation
where we suppose to do otherwise. I was a scientist, besides somehow liberal, I
was had some behaviors of them; this is impossible to find a constant war
without an wound to show.
The first attempt by the
authorities was to isolate the infected ones, but they found out that it was
not enough, somehow the contamination spread out in spite the distance between
the contaminated ones. In an insane action, the governments of some countries
start out to kill the people on the reasoning of eliminating any possibility of
contamination; some has said in opened TV that this is a national action, not a
murder in mass. Even important one was not fast under the eye of devil, the eye
of the insane and reasonless disease. All the cruelty of human came out on a
single look. The educated one started to lose control seeing a world not so
organized and “equal” as they claimed and had learnt to believe, to see, to
defend, to define. The most intriguing was the way the cases appeared, started
from one isolated for a random spread-out, without any mathematical model. Some
mathematician predicted an uncorrelated appearance, meaning not possibility of
avoiding; somehow it was not connected to space or even time. As the eternal,
foolish, and effort-wasting search for the prime numbers series in the
mathematics history, one could not even predict the next place of contamination
or the next death. On some countries, the most rich and influence men built
barriers on the intention of protecting their “valuable” lives from the
“meaningless” existences, but useless, most of them died alone, without a
single help.
On my walks, I see cars
and building, most of them a challenge to physics and nature, but all over them
empty and useless constructions. Some of them turned into place for the old
homeless that survived the death in mass. This was the first time on history
that the poor ones lasted. Any attempt of showing richness to God, was just a
foolish action, they died as “men.”; some without any honor; On the extreme
case, one somehow managed to kill a huge amount of homeless and asked for
transplant on the belief of cleaning the body; they died as the poor victims.
Sat on a 20-floor building, mine for work, I
dare to bring back what one day I have neglected, my reasons are meaningless
and the action, I believe, noble. If one day the human race will reface this,
at least they will have the report of a scientist, of someone that have learnt
so much he wanted, but nothing could do for avoiding what he has planning the
most, salving lives, helping people.
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